Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
After that...i NeeD a dRiNk!!!
Well what a freakin Saturday!!! Tonight was my first weekend night back at Whiskey Kitchen and man did it kick my ass. The people just kept cramming in that place like sardines. SPEAKING of sardines, I watched "LoverBoy (circa 1989) last night and it was hilarious! Anyhow back to the subject. Ever since I started working there, I have had the pleasure of meeting tons of amazing new friends/acquaintances. Not seeing most of them for over a month seemed like a lifetime and apparently they all missed me...lol. It was great to be back to work and making some money wasn't bad either. I was exhausted by the time that I got off. Unfortunately I forgot to inform my manager that I was a double and he didn't cut me until almost 1 o'clock..Geeze silly me. As I was leaving, I ran into a friend of mine. He use to be extremely happy to see me and was always hugged my neck but tonight he was cold. Around Thanksgiving, he told me that he liked me and that he wanted to "date"me. ANYONE who knows me, knows that is when I decided to run for the hills. Why couldn't things just stay like they were. Well the last time that we spoke of our situation, he accused me of playing games and that I could just call him when I figured things out. Well everyone knows that my favorite pass time is losing my phone. I NEVER want people to be angry or disappointed in me but since I didn't have his number, he probably just thought that I was over it. Tonight he acted as if I broke him heart. I truly hope that is not the case because I never meant to hurt him.
Next on the agenda...Checking my FaceBook. It had been over 24 hours since I had checked my Facebook and stuff, so I was eager to log in. No longer then thirty seconds after I logged in, my ex IM-ed me. I said hello and I attempted not to go down that path he always takes me on. We have been broke up for almost three YeArS. We ended our relationship because he was a youngin that had no idea what he wanted with me. But apparently losing me was all it took...lol..because ever since then, he has been non-stop trying to get me back. (who would blame him...just joking) Well tonight he threw me a total curve ball. It usually consist of "hey how are you?" "I miss you" "i hate your tattoos" "you are so beautiful" "we are made for each other"...blah blah blah. Tonight he asked " what would you say if i asked you to marry me?". I replied "I would probably jump off a cliff!!!" Seriously I have no idea what is going on with me but anything that has to do with relationships or LoVe, makes me want to seriously barf! I decided that it would be best if I did what I normally did when he started this with me, ignore him. Then my phone rang....it wasn't him.
When I felt my phone vibrate, I just knew that it was him calling. It was someone else, someone else that scares the sh*t out of me. This guy is a super guy. We have been out a few times together and it went great. Ummmm heLLo Jennifer Marie, you do not want to get into a relationship or anything like it. DO NOT GET ATTACHED. There is so much that is in store for you this summer, EUROPE!!! No that is not the only thing that is stopping me from "semi-love". Ewwwww even saying that gives me the chills. I really DO want to fall head over heels in love with someone but I know that when that time comes, I will be ready for it OR maybe not. So I am going to sum this story up fast because I am over it. He went on and on about how great of a girl that I was and that I had such an infectious smile. That he just wanted to make me smile and that he missed me. I wanted to tell him that I missed him to but the truth of the matter is that I am so scared that I have already started to push him away. WTF who does that!!! I always tend to to this to people that show any interest in me yet if you are someone that is horrible for me, I seem to somewhat be interested in you. (I am currently slapping myself in the face) I just don't know what to think of this guy who actually treats me like I should be treated. He is respectful, intelligent, kind, good looking, romantic, cheesy (in a good way), pampering, and so much more. Yet here I am pushing really hard. He knows that I am scared of shit like this. I just hope that he understands. He told me tonight that he himself had fought how he felt about me, but after two months, he was tired of fighting it. He told me that he liked me and that he missed seeing and spending time with me. Not toooooo long after this, I demanded that I was getting off the phone.
LOVELOVELOVE being single, but man it is freaking hard as hell at times! I just don't want to be one of "those" people that are cold, bitter and hurt. I don't want to be that person that has been hurt in the past and they punish good people because of it. I guess that time will only tell. I have always loved the saying "its better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all". I agree with this in every aspect because I have definitely loved and lost BUT to be loved and them lose me...not sure about that one. I guess it can happen.
What a freakin night!!! Well my body is tired, my heart is confused, and my sanity has gone out the window tonight. Maybe tomorrow all of my sense will come back but until then, I cant wait to see what my dreams have in store for me.
~Dream, Believe, Love~
B-Squared
Monday, January 25, 2010
S.A.D. (Singles Awareness Day) aKa Valentine's Day!!!
Soooo tonight was my first night back to Whiskey Kitchen since I have injured my ankle. I was reacquainting myself with everything and looking around at some of the things that has changed over the last 25 days. I just can not believe that it has 25 days have already come and gone this year. They say that time flies when you are having fun but I hate to tell "them", time flies no matter what you are doing. Just thing about it this way...its only three weeks until that day..that dreaded day that most single people hate, Valentines Day!
Well M-Street (which owns Whiskey Kitchen, LIME, and Virago) is having "lovers specials" all weekend at all its restaurants BuT I will say that at least they are having a S.A.D. PARTY (S.ingles A.wareness D.ay) at Whiskey Kitchen. Honestly all this means is that they are going to have 2-4-1 specials that Sunday so that all the single people can come to Whiskey, get drunk, and maybe hook-up if they are lucky. I FREAKIN LOVE IT!!!
Now lets look at Valentines day through my eyes. I am a single 25-year-old woman who really doesn't give two shits about having a date or even that matter a boyfriend on this day or any other. (Not that I would be against DATING someone if the right guy came along) But why is it that on this one day in particular, many singles get so upset that they are "alone" that they feel sooooo sorry for themselves. OH poor poor you. You are NOT alone in that boat! There are ToNs of other single people (like many of my friends and me) that are still out there. This day should not be any different then any other day. If I was in love, I possibly could be singing a whole different tune but seeming that I am not, I say FUCK IT!!! Let those people who are "oh so happy in LoVe" celebrate it with each other. Let those single people who sit at home and mope, I hope that they eat tons of chocolate and get fat. BUT last but not least, Let those people who LOVE being single, let US remind ourselves that we have NO-ONE to answer to and that we CAN and SHOULD do anything or anyONE we feel like!!! ( this is just like that line in 27 Dresses..."Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate sex with random strangers and I feel SO much better!")
This is just the rants and raves of a happily single girl. I cant wait to see what Cupid's day has in store for me!!!!! Fun to be had, drinks to be drank, and memories that I will never forget. So come to Whiskey Kitchen, down some 2-4-1 drinks, and have some fun. More then likely I will either be working or drinking.
IF ANYONE IS READING THIS PLEASE DON'T GET OFFENDED BECAUSE I DO BELIEVE IN LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS BUT I BELIEVE IN THE "UTTER I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU" KIND OF LOVE. IF YOU HAVE FOUND IT THEN CONGRATS TO YOU BOTH. I JUST THINK THAT I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS THEN WHAT I DESERVE..AND TRUST ME, I HAVE NOT MET HIM YET! SOMEDAY MY PRINCE WILL COME...OR MAYBE I WILL JUST BE A LONELY CAT LADY!!!!
BuT you know what really matters...I luvers you!!!
~Dream, Believe, Love~
Beebs
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Right Place..Right Time, FINALLY!!!!
Pho Friday.
I think that I am going to go to bed early so that Pho Friday comes quicker...I love me some authentic Vietnamese food...Charlotte Pike here I come!!!!New Year....New Adventures!!!
As I welcomed 2010 into my life I only wonder what this year has in store for me. Will this be the year that I find love? Does this year have something unpredictable for me up its sleeve? Is this the year that I go back and finish school? Would this be the year that I leave Tennessee to discover the world? WHAT IS TO BECOME OF ME????
Well...This is what I do know that I "want" of 2010:
Growing up in California I was smack dab in the middle of diversity and culture. I never felt the judgmental looks that I received when I moved to Camden, Tennessee. Being a 10-year old girl in a town that has little to non diversity or ethic culture, everyone looked at me like I was an space alien. When I lived in Cali there were just as many "white kids" as there were Asians, Hispanics, Blacks, and etc. So the point that I am trying to make with this is that I spent my formative years in a town that is very closed minded when it comes to the broad spectrum of traveling and culture. I am NOT saying that everyone is closed minded or cultural incompetent. I am just stating the fact there I can probably safely say that more then half of "Camdenites" think that coming to Nashville is a HUGE trip. Everyone has their own outlooks on life, vacation and culture (which I 100% respect) but there is just SO much out there to experience and be seen. Everyone should be mandatory to have a Passport.
A LITTLE ABOUT MY BACKGROUND. My father (a good ol tennessee redneck) was once in the Coast Guard. As a child I recall listening to all of his stories about being on that huge ship and seeing all the photos he captured along his journies. My mother (Vietnamese) was born raised in Vietnam and lived a whole other culture until she moved to the U.S. during the Vietnam war. On my 21st birthday my parents bought me a plane ticket to go to Vietnam with my mother to visit my family who I had never met before. (THIS WAS THE SPARK THAT LIT MY FIRE FOR TRAVEL)
Vietnam was amazing!!!! I grew up reading and learning about the Vietnam War but I never thought that it would be a place that I would consider a "vacation location". As I boarded that huge double decker plane, I was not sure what was awaiting for me across the Big Blue Pacific. Weeks flew by that ended when it arrived at the month mark aka our departure date, I was sad to go. Not only did I not want to leave my family that I have just met but there was sooooo much more that I wanted to discover and see! Just think about all the places, towns, walls, trees, rice fields, temples that were touched by the Vietnam War. How was I suppose to be satisfied with just one month? How could people not want to SEE this? When was I going to be able to come back to discover more?....
"Well i don't know how to travel"...Seriously come on, its 2010. Google it!!!!
"I can't"...Well with that attitude, of course not. What is holding you back?
"Its so expensive"...You can not take your money with you when you die!
"What if's"...You only live once and YES trust me, you will not regret it.
All I am trying to say is that you only live once!!! If you want to travel, trAvel. If you dont, dont!
Then there was my London trip back in 2007. NO EXPLANATION NEEDED. Tons of history and eminence amounts of culture. I was there for two and a half weeks and man did we sight see. Once again, how could I possibly see everything that I wanted to see in that small amount of time?...PiCk and ChooSe. Capture the mental image of all that beauty and move on to the next thing. MAN I can not wait to go back. Which lead me to my next adventure....
BeeKah Travels Europe (BeeKah=Beebe and Beka combined)
Beka and I came up with this hair-brained scheme about 6years ago when we first met each other. We have talked then traveled, talked and traveled, and talked BUT have NEVER traveled together. Then late last summer we were discussing what was next on our agenda aka where we were going to move to next. Then the idea came to us..CONQUER EUROPE!!! So we had made up our minds..we are backpack bound! Our journey will begin next June and we will finish it up probably early September. We have sooooo much to plan for and sooooo much to look forward to: wine in Italy, chocolate in Switzerland, beer in Ireland, and HoT European men all over the place...these are all pluses in my book!
So....you wanna know where we are planning on heading???
NEXT ON THE AGENDA: Moving to another city
Well the main question is IF I return from Europe. I DO believe that my Prince Charming is going to sweep me up and let me live in his castle forever ;) Doesnt that sound great?!?!? Well all dreams set aside, I am wanting a change in location (NASHVILLE WILL BE MY HOME SOMEDAY). Where this will be, I have no idea. Ideally it would be somewhere nice and warm so that I can prance around in all my tiny dresses! SO DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY IDEAS? Hmmmmm I need connections with a beach house...lol
SCHOOL SCHOOL AND MORE SCHOOL: Where?
So I am planning on moving so I should look into colleges and maybe that will affect where I go. Hmmm maybe I should research schools and then let that decide where I move. Grad School...might as well!
ITS ALL ABOUT ME: Yes it is!!!
This past year I have been putting myself back together. Figuring out who I am, what I want, what I need, what i WANT, and even who I want. This is a difficult decision because who knows what they want? I sure as hell do not!!! All that I do know is that I will not do anything that is swayed or persuaded by anyone but me. It is always nice to have peoples thoughts and opinion and YES there are those times that we have to do things that we do not want to (like certain bars or restaurants, etc.)...I will give in on those type things. BUT the big issues are what I am in total control of and I MYSELF have to live with the outcome! So if I am happy with myself then maybe everyone else around me will be to!!!
GOALS GOALS GOALS: Touchdown!!!!!!
What is there to explain here...I know what I want and I WILL achieve and conquer them all!
YOUR BODY IS A WONDERLAND: Thank You John Mayer
Doesn't everyone always say that this will be the year that they will get in shape and love the way they look. Well that is not what I am saying. All that I am saying here is that I want to LOVE my body. How can I say that I am "out of shape" because I am in a healthy weight range and I am a size 3 (really can i consider myself overweight?). It is just that every time that I look at myself, I ALWAYS see the "ugly" part that i dislike about my body. I do understand that most women tend to do this but seriously, I need to learn to love everything about myself.
Let me tell you what i "don't like" about about my physical self:
SUGARLAND ROCKS: enough said..I am never settlin'
http://www.cmt.com/videos/sugarland/124873/settlin.jhtml
Adios, bye-bye, cheerio, ciao, goodbye, hasta la vista, have a nice day, godspeed, so long, toodle-oo, parting is such sweet sorrow....our time has come to an end!!!!
This is just the crazy ramblings of a travel crazed girl. I just wanted to get some of these thoughts out of my head and into the vast world of the world wide web! This is just a tiny tidbit of many more comical blogs to come....
*Dream, Believe, Love*
beebe
Well...This is what I do know that I "want" of 2010:
- TrAveL TrAveL TrAveL
- Moving to a different city
- Finding a way to go back to school
- Finally getting back to "me" and what i NEED
- Achieving all the goals that I set myself up for
- STICKING with my physical fitness routine
- NeveR settling for less then I deserve
- I know that as each day changes...many more "wants" will be added to my list
Growing up in California I was smack dab in the middle of diversity and culture. I never felt the judgmental looks that I received when I moved to Camden, Tennessee. Being a 10-year old girl in a town that has little to non diversity or ethic culture, everyone looked at me like I was an space alien. When I lived in Cali there were just as many "white kids" as there were Asians, Hispanics, Blacks, and etc. So the point that I am trying to make with this is that I spent my formative years in a town that is very closed minded when it comes to the broad spectrum of traveling and culture. I am NOT saying that everyone is closed minded or cultural incompetent. I am just stating the fact there I can probably safely say that more then half of "Camdenites" think that coming to Nashville is a HUGE trip. Everyone has their own outlooks on life, vacation and culture (which I 100% respect) but there is just SO much out there to experience and be seen. Everyone should be mandatory to have a Passport.
A LITTLE ABOUT MY BACKGROUND. My father (a good ol tennessee redneck) was once in the Coast Guard. As a child I recall listening to all of his stories about being on that huge ship and seeing all the photos he captured along his journies. My mother (Vietnamese) was born raised in Vietnam and lived a whole other culture until she moved to the U.S. during the Vietnam war. On my 21st birthday my parents bought me a plane ticket to go to Vietnam with my mother to visit my family who I had never met before. (THIS WAS THE SPARK THAT LIT MY FIRE FOR TRAVEL)
Vietnam was amazing!!!! I grew up reading and learning about the Vietnam War but I never thought that it would be a place that I would consider a "vacation location". As I boarded that huge double decker plane, I was not sure what was awaiting for me across the Big Blue Pacific. Weeks flew by that ended when it arrived at the month mark aka our departure date, I was sad to go. Not only did I not want to leave my family that I have just met but there was sooooo much more that I wanted to discover and see! Just think about all the places, towns, walls, trees, rice fields, temples that were touched by the Vietnam War. How was I suppose to be satisfied with just one month? How could people not want to SEE this? When was I going to be able to come back to discover more?....
"Well i don't know how to travel"...Seriously come on, its 2010. Google it!!!!
"I can't"...Well with that attitude, of course not. What is holding you back?
"Its so expensive"...You can not take your money with you when you die!
"What if's"...You only live once and YES trust me, you will not regret it.
All I am trying to say is that you only live once!!! If you want to travel, trAvel. If you dont, dont!
Then there was my London trip back in 2007. NO EXPLANATION NEEDED. Tons of history and eminence amounts of culture. I was there for two and a half weeks and man did we sight see. Once again, how could I possibly see everything that I wanted to see in that small amount of time?...PiCk and ChooSe. Capture the mental image of all that beauty and move on to the next thing. MAN I can not wait to go back. Which lead me to my next adventure....
BeeKah Travels Europe (BeeKah=Beebe and Beka combined)
Beka and I came up with this hair-brained scheme about 6years ago when we first met each other. We have talked then traveled, talked and traveled, and talked BUT have NEVER traveled together. Then late last summer we were discussing what was next on our agenda aka where we were going to move to next. Then the idea came to us..CONQUER EUROPE!!! So we had made up our minds..we are backpack bound! Our journey will begin next June and we will finish it up probably early September. We have sooooo much to plan for and sooooo much to look forward to: wine in Italy, chocolate in Switzerland, beer in Ireland, and HoT European men all over the place...these are all pluses in my book!
So....you wanna know where we are planning on heading???
- France
- Czech Republic
- Austria
- Belgium
- Turkey
- England
- Switzerland
- Hungary
- Germany
- Greece
- Italy
- Spain
- Netherlands
- Ireland
NEXT ON THE AGENDA: Moving to another city
Well the main question is IF I return from Europe. I DO believe that my Prince Charming is going to sweep me up and let me live in his castle forever ;) Doesnt that sound great?!?!? Well all dreams set aside, I am wanting a change in location (NASHVILLE WILL BE MY HOME SOMEDAY). Where this will be, I have no idea. Ideally it would be somewhere nice and warm so that I can prance around in all my tiny dresses! SO DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY IDEAS? Hmmmmm I need connections with a beach house...lol
SCHOOL SCHOOL AND MORE SCHOOL: Where?
So I am planning on moving so I should look into colleges and maybe that will affect where I go. Hmmm maybe I should research schools and then let that decide where I move. Grad School...might as well!
ITS ALL ABOUT ME: Yes it is!!!
This past year I have been putting myself back together. Figuring out who I am, what I want, what I need, what i WANT, and even who I want. This is a difficult decision because who knows what they want? I sure as hell do not!!! All that I do know is that I will not do anything that is swayed or persuaded by anyone but me. It is always nice to have peoples thoughts and opinion and YES there are those times that we have to do things that we do not want to (like certain bars or restaurants, etc.)...I will give in on those type things. BUT the big issues are what I am in total control of and I MYSELF have to live with the outcome! So if I am happy with myself then maybe everyone else around me will be to!!!
GOALS GOALS GOALS: Touchdown!!!!!!
What is there to explain here...I know what I want and I WILL achieve and conquer them all!
YOUR BODY IS A WONDERLAND: Thank You John Mayer
Doesn't everyone always say that this will be the year that they will get in shape and love the way they look. Well that is not what I am saying. All that I am saying here is that I want to LOVE my body. How can I say that I am "out of shape" because I am in a healthy weight range and I am a size 3 (really can i consider myself overweight?). It is just that every time that I look at myself, I ALWAYS see the "ugly" part that i dislike about my body. I do understand that most women tend to do this but seriously, I need to learn to love everything about myself.
Let me tell you what i "don't like" about about my physical self:
- I have extremely tiny ankles
- My inner thighs touch
- I have a weird dimple in my lower stomach that has always been there and wont go away
- My left foot is a half size bigger
- I wish that I had a different nose
- I was diagnosed with "no-ass-at-all" disease
- My bangs always split and i hate it
- I hate that the hair in my armpits are so dark that even if I shave, you can still see them
SUGARLAND ROCKS: enough said..I am never settlin'
http://www.cmt.com/videos/sugarland/124873/settlin.jhtml
Adios, bye-bye, cheerio, ciao, goodbye, hasta la vista, have a nice day, godspeed, so long, toodle-oo, parting is such sweet sorrow....our time has come to an end!!!!
This is just the crazy ramblings of a travel crazed girl. I just wanted to get some of these thoughts out of my head and into the vast world of the world wide web! This is just a tiny tidbit of many more comical blogs to come....
*Dream, Believe, Love*
beebe
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